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Comedy

  • Money cannot buy happiness – but it’s far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
  • Forgive your enemy – but remember his name.
  • If you help someone when they’re in trouble – they will remember you when they’re in trouble again.
  • Alcohol does not solve any problems – but then again, neither does milk.
  • Many people are alive only because it’s illegal to shoot them.